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A Parenting Solution For The Demanding Child

By Bob Lancer   |  Tuesday, March 26th, 2013

When do you become flustered with your children?

 

It probably happens when you feel yourself barraged by unreasonable, self-centered demands.

 

Motivational Parenting Quotes

There is no friendship, no love, like that of the parent for the child. ~
Henry Ward Beecher

You come home from work.  And immediately you are being begged to do this or that.

 

You might try to accommodate your child, but that’s not enough.  The begging child demands that you do more, do something differently than you did it.

 

The child demands to be pleased, and you find yourself feeling strained in your attempt to please.  You see no way to please, and YOU feel VERY DISPLEASED.

 

To begin solving this parenting problem, approach it as an opportunity for your growth rather than an opportunity to blame or resent your child for being so difficult, demanding and self-centered.

 

From the “how can I grow” perspective you can then examine your way of dealing with the situation and find better options.

 

From the “blame” perspective, parents focus on how the child is behaving wrongly, overlooking how wrongly they are dealing with it.

 

When we parents begin feeling frustrated, flustered, stressed out in reaction to child behavior, our child is not making that happen.  Our way of reacting is making it happen.  This is a crucial distinction!

 

It’s all too common, when parents feel frustrated by an incessantly demanding child, the parents explode in a rage.

 

But if you really look at this reaction, it characterizes the exact opposite of what the parent really wants.

 

It takes the parent from the unpleasantness of frustration into the more extremely unpleasant state of rage. So, obviously, rage is an inadequate strategy for improving how you feel.

 

This points to the next stage of the parenting solution for the demanding child.  Consider how you want to feel and determine to feel that way despite your child’s demands.

 

Concentrate on maintaining your peace and poise.  If you find it difficult to maintain your peace and poise, do your best and you will grow in the ability to do so more and more effectively.

 

Now, as you become calm, and stop trying to please your child, your child will likely become increasingly frustrated with YOU.

 

Do your best to stay relaxed and at peace, and from peace you can find compassion.  You can calmly, quietly love your child as your child works out his frustration on his own over not being able to control YOU.

 

Some might think you have to yell at your child to “teach” him that he needs to relate with you in a more considerate and less demanding way, but this tactic blares with hypocrisy when you really look at it.  It models harshness as a means of teaching more gentleness!  It models demandingness in an attempt to teach the opposite.

 

Sometimes, by simply maintaining your calm and compassionate center and NOT straining to please, you allow LIFE to teach your child the lesson he or she needs.  That not only saves you effort and strain, it gives your child the chance to grow.

 

There’s a parenting solution for the demanding child.

Powerful Parenting Success Principles

By Bob Lancer   |  Tuesday, March 19th, 2013

When we operate from the belief that our parenting success depends upon getting our child to do what we want, parenting becomes draining and frustrating.

 

Parenting children

Concentrate on doing the right thing when interacting with your child. Be the example you would want your child to follow.

While it SEEMS that our child’s resistance to our direction makes the child-parent relationship difficult, it is this underlying belief that is the true cause.

 

This belief fosters an attitude of parent helplessness and dependency upon the child.

 

In other words, it makes the child in charge and leaves us feeling powerless.

 

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you learned that your success and satisfaction in parenting depended only on your application of certain principles that  guarantee the positive results you are after?

 

The fact is that such principles do in fact exist, and those who experience the most satisfaction and success with their children, with the least wasted effort, conflict and stress, adhere to these principles in their child-parent relationship.

 

One great pleasure of relying on these principles is the feeling of independence.  You no longer feel dependent upon your child’s will or whim.

 

You don’t feel desperate to gain your child’s agreement.  You don’t worry about losing control of your child.

 

You don’t have to engage in straining power-struggles to force cooperation or compliance.

 

You know that you only have to focus on what YOU are doing, in the now, to perpetuate the progress you want to make.

 

So what are these powerful parenting success principles?

 

There are many.  The foundation principal on which the rest rely is simply the principle that states: Awareness Leads To Control.

 

To increase your success without stress with your children, make it your daily practice to refine your action’s alignment with awareness in the now.

 

In this context, the word “action” does not only apply to your physical actions.  It applies to your mental and emotional activity as well.  It applies to what you say, when you say it, and how you say it.  It applies to the activity of your attention or to what you choose to pay attention to in the now.

 

As you simply PRACTICE being more aware in the now, you will begin recognize more and more clearly ways that you can shift, change or refine your emotional responses, actions, speech and thoughts to more easily achieve what you want with your child.

 

Conquering Toddler Fears

By Guest Author   |  Thursday, January 3rd, 2013
wisdom in children for overcoming fear

The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown.
~ H. P. Lovecraft

If your normally easy-going child seems suddenly afraid of everything and clingy, you’re not alone.

 

As babies begin to transition from infant to toddler, fear blossoms almost as quickly as they seem to be growing.

While it may take you by surprise, the reality is that these fears, whether they’re concerns about the dark, monsters under the bed, or something completely rational, put your child on the normal track to development.

The key is learning how to deal with those fears. These tips may help.

Figure Out What May Be Causing the Fears

If you understand what is causing the fears, it’s possible you can help your child overcome them.

Think carefully about what’s going on in your toddler’s life at the moment. Is there a new teacher in his or her daycare? Has the routine changed significantly in recent days?

If there’s something that has created stress in your child’s life, that can lead to both rational and irrational fears.

Big events like falling in the water or even seeing a small fire in the kitchen could also create a very real sense of instability in your child’s life and lead to a variety of fears.

Acknowledge Your Child’s Feelings

The idea that there might be a monster under your child’s bed may seem nothing short of ridiculous to you, but to your child, it’s a serious source of concern.

Downplaying or ignoring your child’s fears could be damaging to his emotional development. Make certain you validate those feelings while still helping your child work to overcome them.

Reassurance is a Must

Once you understand exactly what your child is afraid of, you need to work to let them know that everything will be okay. Cuddle with your little one to help him feel a bit better.

Remember, also, that you shouldn’t just pay attention to your child when those fears come into play.

Stay interested in the happy moods too, or you risk making the fears bigger and more dramatic than they actually are.

Overreacting Only Makes Things Worse

Becoming overprotective of your child as a result of those fears can make things quite a bit worse.

You can’t simply let your child avoid all of the things that may worry him, but you also shouldn’t force him into every unfamiliar or uncomfortable situation. Work together to overcome the fear and offer support without hitting “Momzilla” mode.

Patience Is a Must

You may think up the single most creative solution in the world to your child’s problem, but it’s important to remember that his fears are completely normal, and they will fade at some point.

They just may not fade on your schedule. Don’t get frustrated with your child. Instead, be patient as he works to overcome his issues.

Children, and toddlers especially, are very good at taking cues from their parents.

The way you react to your own fears and concerns helps to guide their development.

 

Teaching confidence at every opportunity can help the two of you get past the fear stage.

 

Heather Nosworth is a writer with a passion for children and parenting. She regularly contributes to the Parenting & New Baby Advice Blog, where you can find more parenting articles along with unique baby gifts and gift ideas.

Parenting Tips: Awaken Parenting Intuition

By Bob Lancer   |  Monday, September 10th, 2012

The child behavior that you encounter gives YOU an opportunity to grow.

 

At the heart of raising children is raising ourselves.

 

Raising kids is a learning experience for the parents who look for a way to do a better job.

 

Raising Children

Encourage and support your kids because children are apt to live up to what you believe of them.
~ Lady Bird Johnson ~

Ideally, parents and children grow TOGETHER.

 

Parenting help is always available to those parents who want to do better and to feel better in their relationship with their children.

 

You always have access to wise parenting advice WITHIN.

 

Calm down, observe your child, and open your heart and mind to understanding what is happening.  This awakens your PARENTING INTUITION.

 

Your child is really like an open book that you can read.  Just pay calm attention, with a tranquil, trusting heart and open to your inner source of wisdom.

 

You will see what you can do for your child’s good.  Parenting your child is a creative process, for your way of relating with your child influences the development of your child’s personality.

 

When you calmly observe your child with a heart and mind open to your own best inner judgment of what to do about it, you overcome your habitual reaction patterns and demonstrate new and improved parenting skills.  In other words, you raise yourself as you raise your child.

 

Parents want parenting tips from experts, while they have a parenting expert living within them that they overlook when they emotionally react to child behavior.

 

Help for parents who feel stressed out and are at their wits end becomes available when they return to calm confidence.

 

Your child is not responsible for how you react.  To know what to do about your child discipline challenges, practice non-reactivity.

 

Calm down, observe your child and confidently EXPECT that you will receive an idea, an insight, and inspiration that guides you from within.

 

Emotional reactions blind us to the truth.

 

In peace you can understand your child.

 

Raising kids is a learning experience for the parents who calmly pay attention to what is happening.

 

Our children’s challenging behavior calls upon us to grow.

 

Parenting Advice: Stay Connected With Your Children

By Noah Brown   |  Friday, September 7th, 2012

Does your child display anger and agitation at public places? Check out this useful advice on parenting!

 

(Editor’s Note: This is a guest blog by Noah Brown, a prolific freelance writer who writes extensively on advice for parents, child behavior and parent child relationship issues.)

 

Good Parenting

Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness; but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each. ~ Plato

Anyone who has ever witnessed poor child behavior in a public place automatically looks at the parents as if they simply allow the child to run amuck and do whatever he pleases. In many cases, parents find it difficult to correct a misbehaving child without yelling or hitting.

 

Most working parents leave raising their child up to a daycare, babysitters, and nannies or even to the teachers at school. The truth is that there is no person in the world who can raise your kid better than you.

 

If you have to go off to work to support your family, rules must be set for the kids as well as their caretakers. By following this parenting advice, you will not only see a great improvement in child behavior but also grow stronger and closer child parent relationships.

 

Those Terrible Tantrums

One of the most nerve wracking child behavior problems that a parent must endure is tantrums. A lot of people think that tantrums are a normal part of child development but they are wrong. Kids throw temper tantrums to get what they want and to control their parents.

 

It is essential that you find a solution and get expert parenting advice to improve this child behavior immediately. You should calmly and quietly inform the children that if they do not stop misbehaving, they will go into time out or lose other privileges such as their favorite TV show or a special toy.

 

If the child behavior does not improve, follow through with the time out or sanctions. It enables you to teach the child that you are the authority figure. He will learn to respect you and eventually the child parent relationships grow stronger.

 

Don’t Feed the Finicky

 

Children use to dominate the dinner menu by refusing to eat what is on the table. Many parents, especially working parents who lack good parenting skills simply give in and whip up chicken nuggets or macaroni and cheese rather than teaching the kids to eat the meal that has been prepared for the family. You must put your foot down and make them eat their meals.

 

Should they choose not to eat, send them to bed and wrap the meal for the following day. The child will learn to eat what is available. Knowing that you won’t back down will show the child that you mean business and he will learn to obey you.

 

Handling Homework Troubles

Nearly every grade school kid tries to avoid doing their homework. This is a common child behavior however; it must be corrected as your child’s education is of the utmost importance. It’s best to set aside a specific time for getting homework completed. Your child might tell you that he has no homework and expect to go out to play. This should never happen.

 

When a child tells their parents they don’t have homework, the parents need to realize that they may or may not be telling the truth. The scheduled time for homework should always be utilized for education. If there is no homework on a given day, the child should spend the time studying or preparing themselves for the next lesson.

 

Working parents should hold fast to this schedule as making time to meet with teachers can be difficult as well as problematic for your employer. Once the child understands that this time is always dedicated to his studies, their homework will never be undone, according to child behavior counselors.

 

Showing the child you are concerned about his education is a very important element of good parenting and an effective technique for inspiring children.

 

An Alternative To Saying “No” To Your Kids

By Bob Lancer   |  Friday, June 29th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

Our parental “job” includes instilling wisdom in our children.

Disciplining Children

If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves. ~ C.G. Jung

 

There are good reasons why parents would like to find an alternative to using the word “No” with their children.

 

You don’t want to HAVE to motivate your child to “do the right thing.”

 

Wouldn’t you love sensible ideas to bring as much inspiration to your kids as, say, the idea of shooting off firecrackers?

 

Having to frequently say ‘No’ can make parenting exhausting, and it causes some parents to feel that they are being too negative in the parent-child relationship.

 

If YOU have an issue saying “No”, and you want to instill practical life-wisdom in your child, try instead to tell your child of the reason why and what to do instead.

 

For instance, if your child asks for a second scoop of ice cream, instead of telling him “No”, try saying something like this to lead him to impose positive child discipline upon himself: “That would mean too much sugar, which is not good for the brain. But if you stop requesting another scoop you can have one scoop.”

 

This way of responding resolves the parenting issues of having to say “No” and feeling that you always have to impose boundaries for your child.

 

It ends on a positive note by pointing out what the child CAN have or do. It also helps the child development of understanding that actions have consequences, and to consider the consequences before acting on a desire.

 

Disciplining children is never all that much fun. The sooner our kids can responsibly discipline themselves the better.

 

By providing your child is a simple, brief explanation of what is undesirable about what she wants you actually educate her about what is good for her.

 

At the same time, you motivate your child to cooperate with you by helping her to see the positive outcome of cooperating with you: specifically, not requesting another scoop results in getting one scoop now.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

Parenting Help: Improve Your Child’s Environment

By Bob Lancer   |  Monday, June 25th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

To improve child behavior, improve your child’s surroundings.

Good Parenting

Provide the child with influences that help the child display the positive child conduct you want

 

How a child behaves is a largely product of the child’s environment.

 

The child’s environment consists of the influences surrounding the child, including the influences emanating from people within that environment.

 

To help your child avoid or overcome behavior problems improve the emotional and behavior patterns impinging upon your child.

 

Parenting help for better child behavior generally involves working on the child’s environment in order to:

1… Avoid exposing the child to influences that contribute to behavior problems.

2… Provide the child with influences that help the child display the positive child conduct you want.

 

If all we focus on is getting the child to change WITHOUT changing the child’s environment, our efforts will be undermined by the disturbing environmental that led to the child’s behavior problem.

 

For instance, if your child withdraws from other kids, choosing to spend her time alone, that child may have received excessive criticism in her home environment, eroding her self-confidence.

 

Sometimes there is something happening at home that causes the child to feel ashamed.

 

There may be someone in the child’s home environment modeling a similar pattern of sensitivity that drives that person toward solitude and unsociability.

 

As long as the negative environmental factors remain unchanged, child discipline problems are likely to continue reflecting them.

 

In my own parent counseling practice I have often found that the parent help needed for improving how kids behave involves guiding parents in how to bring more order, calmness, attentiveness, positive modeling and love into the child’s environment.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

When It Is Wise To Ignore Your Child

By Bob Lancer   |  Saturday, June 23rd, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

To skillfully support child development, remember that there is a time for responding to your child and a time for NOT responding.

support child development

One key for raising children toward self-reliance is the parenting practice of being just responsive enough

If we are not responsive enough, we lose parental control as our child grows frustrated.

 

This is because and a frustrated child (like a frustrated adult) cannot help but slip into some form of behavior problem.

We teach our children, and the education may prove negative, through the way that we respond to our kids.

 

Being too non-responsive not only frustrates the child with the sense of denied parent access. It teaches the child, through our modeling, to BE non-responsive. This may manifest as the child not “listening” and being generally inattentive.

 

But, while a sufficient amount of parental involvement is crucial for positive child development and child behavior, it is also possible to be TOO responsive with a child.

 

If we respond automatically to a child’s request (or demand) for our attention, assistance or cooperation we demonstrate a weak form of child behavior management that actually trains the child to be overly demanding.

 

We also needlessly exhaust ourselves through the form of excessive parent involvement that we can describe as being overly responsive.

 

Help for parents who over-stress themselves through excessive responsiveness arrives as they apply the self-help wisdom of being more conscious in parenting.

 

Sometimes it is better to not respond as a means of teaching the child that the behavior she is using to get our response is unacceptable.

 

One key for raising children toward self-reliance is the parenting practice of being just responsive enough.

 

Be aware during your parent-child interactions to avoid automatically reacting to your child without first pausing to determine if reacting in the way that you are about to react is really wise right now.

 

If you HABITUALLY respond when your child demands your attention, you produce your own frustration and lead your child toward the relationship problems that stem from being overly demanding.

 

Don’t blame your child for this.  Realize that your reactions of stress and strain are NOT your child’s responsibility.  How you react is YOUR responsibility.

 

Practice the parenting wisdom of more CONSCIOUS parenting to more alertly recognize when you need to respond, and when you need to deliberately NOT respond to your child, for the best parenting results and experiences.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

Some Of The Most Powerful Parenting Advice

By Bob Lancer   |  Thursday, May 31st, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

Child Parent Relationships

Close observation of the child is among the most essential parenting skills for improving child behavior

Children are their parents!

 

More specifically, how a child behaves, the child’s mood patterns, attitudes, ways of communicating and emotionally reacting – even thought patterns -  all reflect their parents to a significant extent.

 

In a sense, raising children means raising ourselves.

 

In my parenting classes, parents quickly realize how their children’s behavior problems demonstrate behaviors those parents themselves have modeled.

 

Some of the most powerful parenting advice that can be delivered is to observe your child closely to recognize the ways that his or her behavior reveals how YOU need to change.

 

Close observation of the child is among the most essential parenting skills for improving child behavior.

 

When you really see how a problem behavior displayed by your child replicates a pattern of your own, you hold the key to leading the child into improved behavior.

 

For instance, one parent observed that her child loses her emotional balance too easily and frequently, leading the child into wild, destructive, rebellious behavior.

 

This parent recognized the same tendency (or weakness) of emotional imbalance in herself, and then set to work on getting a better handle on it.

 

As this mother progressed in her self-work, she found her daughter’s self-control improving.

 

This mother realized that she didn’t really need parents tips for controlling her child – she needed self-work for improving her own self-control.

 

The fact that children become like their parents does not have to cause parents to blame and feel badly about themselves when their children misbehave.  All that would accomplish is de-motivate them to even try to do better.  And that, by extension, would do the opposite of motivating their children to do better.

 

Apply some of the most powerful parenting advice by observing your child with the aim of recognizing ways that you can raise yourself… for your child.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

Inspiring Children To Learn Life Wisdom

By Marilyn Cramer   |  Saturday, May 12th, 2012

Wisdom For Kids

“Treat others as you would like to be treated.” ~ The Golden Rule

 

 

Wisdom For Kids

“What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.” – Pericles

 

The Happiness of Giving - Wisdom For Children

“You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.” ~ John Wooden

 

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Motivate Your Child – Mother Quotes Of Wisdom

By Marilyn Cramer   |  Thursday, May 10th, 2012

 

Wisdom For Children

“Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example instead of his advice”

 

Wisdom For Children

One good mother is worth a hundred schoolmasters. ~ George Herbert

 

Parenting Skills

"A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary." ~ Dorothy Canfield Fisher

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A Mother’s Love

By Marilyn Cramer   |  Thursday, May 10th, 2012
Loving Mother Quotes

No influence is so powerful as that of the mother. ~ Sarah Josepha Hale

 

 

Mother Quotes With Love

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. ~ Sophia Loren

 

Mother Quotes On Parenting Kids

The formative period for building character for eternity is in the nursery. The mother is queen of that realm and sways a scepter more potent than that of kings or priests. ~ Author Unknown

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Inspiring Mother Quotes

By Marilyn Cramer   |  Friday, April 27th, 2012
Mother Quotes

God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers

 

 

 

Positive Parenting Mother Quotes

A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.

 

 

 

Mother Quotes for Parenting Kids With Wisdom

"She’s my teacher, my adviser, my greatest inspiration." ~ Whitney Houston

Apply The Parenting Wisdom of Silence

By Bob Lancer   |  Friday, April 27th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

When it comes to parenting wisdom, no principle may be more important than how we speak to our children.

 

Child Behavior Challenge

Under the influence of a disturbed emotional reaction to a child behavior challenge, we are most likely to say something that negatively impacts child self-esteem, self-confidence and performance.

What we say to our children impacts them deeply.

 

When we feel frustrated with our kids, it’s best to practice the parent wisdom of silence.

 

Under the influence of a disturbed emotional reaction to a child behavior challenge, we are most likely to say something that negatively impacts child self-esteem, self-confidence and performance.

 

What we say to our children forms their mental programming.

 

Telling a child that he never listens, calling a child a slob, labeling your kid selfish or stubborn proves to be a form of self-defeating parenting.

 

Skills in the area of verbal communication help you empower your child.

 

When we feel frustrated our parent-child communication skills are compromised.

 

The next time that you are faced with a child discipline challenge, before you speak, imagine that your child will forever remember what you are about to say.

 

Parenting Wisdom And The Child Behavior Challenge

The next time that you are faced with a child discipline challenge, before you speak, imagine that your child will forever remember what you are about to say

Take a moment to calm down and think about the messages do you WANT your child to remember and live up to?

 

This morning, my 9 year old was making noise while his baby brother slept.

 

I felt like saying, “Why won’t you stop and think about how you are impacting your brother?  He needs his sleep and I don’t want to have to deal with a cranky baby right now! Don’t you care about anyone but yourself?!”

 

But instead of blurting out harsh words, I paused, recognizing I was feeling too upset to speak constructively with my child.

 

So I remained silent.

 

Immediately I realized that all I needed to do was to place my hands on his shoulders and lovingly lead him to a place where his volume would not disturb his brother’s sleep.

 

I’m glad I applied the parenting wisdom of silence to protect his sacred heart.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

Motivated Kids Can Make A Big Difference

By Antara   |  Tuesday, April 17th, 2012

6-Year-Old Raises $10K To Help Ailing Dad

 

Positive Parenting Raises Motivated Kids

Six-year-old Drew Cox selling lemonade to help raise funds for his father's medical bills. Pic courtesy: kltv.com

A 6-year-old boy from Gladewater, Texas has done what most adults would not be able to do. Drew Cox, 6, raised $10,000 at a lemonade stand to help his father Randy Cox who had been diagnosed with Seminoma cancer three months ago.

 

Setting an inspiring example of what a caring child can do, Drew set up a lemonade stall on Walnut Street, Saturday, April 14, to help raise funds for his father’s medical bills. As the word spread about this little boy’s brave effort, cars and people queued up to support his cause by buying a cup of lemonade for 25 cents. By the end of the day, the earnings had reached a whopping $10,000.

 

The beautiful child-parent relationship between this ailing father and his doting son was evident in Drew’s words about his father. “He is so important to me. We like to play with each other. Lots of times we like to play games,” Drew said on KLTV.

 

Drew’s feat is reminiscent of the 4-year-old Alexandra “Alex” Scott, who, battling with a form of childhood cancer – neuroblastoma since before her first birthday, had decided to set up a lemonade stand to raise money for her doctors to help find a cure for all kids with cancer.

 

“Alex was just four-years-old when she asked my wife if she could hold a lemonade stand when she was released from the hospital. When asked what she wanted to do with the money, Alex said she wasn’t keeping it, but instead giving it to her doctors to help find a cure for all kids with cancer. And so, our lemonade crusade began,” writes Jay Scott, Alex’s father and Co-Executive Director, Alex’s Lemonade Stand Foundation, in Huffingtonpost.com.

 

Positive Parenting Techniques

Parenting kids is also about inspiring children to do their bit to make the world a better place

Alex, with the help of volunteers across the country raised over $1 million in her lifetime (she passed away in 2004). But her legacy was carried on by parents who have raised over $50 million toward finding a cure for cancer.

 

Motivated kids set precedents which even adults may find hard to match. It is essential for parents to instill this wisdom in children that they too can make a difference.

 

When you help develop in your child the vision to see beyond his own self and the ability to think for others’ welfare, you motivate your child to grow as a caring, helpful, kind and compassionate human being.

 

Parenting kids is not only about making sure they have the good things of life. It’s about inspiring children to do their bit to make the world a better place.

 

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How To Raise A Wise Child

By Bob Lancer   |  Tuesday, April 17th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

Follow Parenting Wisdom With Your Child

Wisdom guides mastery in all fields of endeavor, including parenting.

To follow parenting wisdom with your child means that you are connecting with your own positive, loving and intelligent intuitive inner guidance.

 

You need to be calm, emotionally balanced, and aware in the now for this to happen.

 

When parents begin feeling frustrated in their efforts to control their child, they break their internal connection with the inner wisdom that can guide them toward healthier, happier parenting success.

 

For instance, if you begin feeling annoyed when your child interrupts your work or demands your attention while you are on the phone, your stressful reaction prevents you from handling the situation as well as you can, from producing the results that you really want.

 

Every parent needs to MASTER the experience of being distracted, to stay sane, content, and constructive.

 

Wisdom guides mastery in all fields of endeavor, including parenting.

 

Wisdom is an inspired state of consciousness that nurtures the soul.

 

When you demonstrate parenting wisdom in your relationship with your child, your inner, harmonious, enlightened state radiates, reaching and nurturing your child’s inner life with those same qualities, producing a happier, more loving and wise child.

 

Parents who complain that their children are too wild would do well to consider this way of helping their children to be more wise.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

Parenting Kids Under Media Glare – A Challenge For Celebrity Parents

By Antara   |  Monday, April 2nd, 2012
Effective Parenting

All parents need to put in extra efforts to build a loving, trusting, friendly and supportive parent child relationship.

The speculations and media glare about Whitney Houston’s daughter Bobbi Kristina’s activities following her mother’s death is making headlines and setting the social media abuzz.

 

The sudden passing away of Houston, an iconic figure for hundreds of thousands music lovers across the globe, has pitch forked her daughter into the spotlight with newspersons and paparazzi tracking her every move. From Oprah Winfrey to leading lifestyle magazines and TV channels, Bobbi Kristina is the talk of the town.

 

Nothing surprising here. Being a celebrity kid isn’t easy and almost all star kids face incessant media attention. For celebrity parents, it becomes a big challenge to ensure that their kids develop healthy child behavior and the wisdom to handle the trappings of fame successfully.

 

There are two sides to the coin of having parents who are super busy celebrities. On the one side, you have a life of luxury, opulence and fame from the time you open your eyes.

 

On the other side, your parents are often away for long periods for work and the media is always at your feet, trailing you, clicking your pictures, selling them for thousands of dollars, speculating on everything you do…it’s a hard life too.

 

Besides, we hear often about celebrity kids trying hard to come to terms with the failed relationships of their parents, peer pressure,  resorting to drug abuse, getting mired in controversies and struggling to match up to public expectations. Behavior problems of kids of star parents get flashed in the media in no time, doubling the pressure on the children and their parents too.

 

Julia Roberts, in a recent interview, lucidly explained her worries about raising her children – seven-year-old twins Hazel and Finn and four-year-old Henry in the spotlight, saying that after she met Meryl Streep’s daughter Grace Gummer, she felt reassured that children do turn out fine.

 

ANI reported that the Daily Telegraph quoted Roberts as telling Vanity Fair magazine, “Grace comes up and goes, ‘Gosh, it’s so sweet seeing all your kids on the set. It reminds me of when I was little, and I would go see my mom at work.”

 

“I said, ‘How old were you when you realized your mom was Meryl Streep?’ She said, ‘I think I was probably nine when I put that all together’.

 

“I said, ‘Were you cool with it?’ She said, ‘Yeah, it was fine. There was no trauma.’ So that was hopeful,” Roberts added, the report said.

Wisdom For Parenting Kids

Positive parenting is to be with your children in their most impressionable formative years.

All parents need to put in extra efforts to build a loving, trusting, friendly and supportive parent child relationship. That is part of positive parenting.

 

For people who are in the limelight, parenting children in a healthy parent child relationship is all the more essential as even their personal and private lives make news – some factual, some speculative and some pure rumors. You cannot always hide your child away from the cameras.

 

But if you instill the wisdom in your kids to understand the life issues that are real and permanent and the trappings that are illusory and temporary and develop in your child the ability to differentiate between the two, the kids grow up to take all this attention, pressures and opulence in their stride.

 

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Solve Child Behavior Problems With Your Inner Parenting Expert

By Bob Lancer   |  Monday, March 12th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

Raising Successful Kids

To raise successful kids, don’t worry about them… BELIEVE in them.

In your quest for great parenting resources, you need look no further than at your own mind.

 

Your own subconscious contains profound answers to your parenting questions.

 

You have a great parenting expert inside of you!

 

To access your own expert parenting advice remember this:

What you envision comes to pass.  This proves true in every area of life, including raising kids.

 

To raise successful kids, don’t worry about them… BELIEVE in them.

 

You will enjoy the results of better parenting by envisioning your child behaving beautifully rather than behaving terribly.

 

When you envision your child as calm, confident, caring and capable, your subconscious responds by guiding you from within, showing you what to do to help your child in line with bringing that wonderful child development outcome about.

 

When we worry about our child’s behavior or character, we mentally picture our child demonstrating behavior problems and character weaknesses in the future.

 

This negative mental vision of the child blocks our subconscious capacity to provide us with wise parenting help for positive child development.  As a consequence of this blockage, we feel powerless, anxious, and out of control in the parent-child relationship.

 

Child Development

You will enjoy the results of better parenting by envisioning your child behaving beautifully rather than behaving terribly.

To employ the power of positive vision for raising children to fulfill their great potential, apply the following positive parenting tip: mentally reverse your child’s behavior problem.

 

For instance, if your child displays too much physical aggression, envision your child calmly behaving in a caring, self-contained manner.

 

If your child displays severe emotional breakdowns on a routine basis, provide your child with behavior help by mentally picturing your child demonstrating terrific emotional balance and healthy self-control.

 

When we worry about our child’s behavior, we envision behavior problems and thus make it harder to raise responsible kids.

 

But to solve or avoid child behavior problems, envision the way you would expect your child to behave if you solved those problems.This is how to access the parenting wisdom of your inner parenting expert.

 

Please feel welcome to share your comments in this blog about this parenting advice, and any questions you have about using the power of mental vision to help your kids display beautiful behavior.

 

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

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Parenting Advice For How To Be A “Lucky Parent”

By Bob Lancer   |  Wednesday, March 7th, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

 

child behavior and child development

The fact is that parent-success is not a matter of luck. Parenting well produces well-behaved children.

The other day someone said to me, “You are really lucky with your 9 year old son. He behaves wonderfully because he came out as a very special child.”

 

My response was, “In my 25 years of teaching parenting skills, I’ve never seen a child who did NOT express the same beautiful spirit you are referring to in my child. But as the parent influences the child development process through the quality of the parent-child relationship, a very ‘difficult child’ may be the result.”

 

Largely because of my deep studies of and our shared interest in child behavior and child development my wife and I have practiced very conscious parenting.

 

The core of our “parenting style” has been to honor our children’s sacred heart, to relate compassionately with their feelings, even when we need to firmly establish a boundary.

 

In the course of my professional parenting education practice I have seen countless moms and dads making serious and all too common parenting mistakes that engendered destructive behavior and emotional problems in their child’s development process.”

 

One core purpose behind my positive parenting classes and the conscious approach to child discipline that I teach is to help parents understand how to AVOID raising kids in ways that produce emotional difficulties and behavior problems.

 

The fact is that parent-success is not a matter of luck.   Parenting well produces well-behaved children.  You can always find problematic parenting practices occurring in the history of children who demonstrate seriously problematic behavior.

 

But there are those prefer to believe that how a kid behaves is a matter of pure luck.  They adhere to this view, perhaps, because it absolves them from a painful sense of responsibility for their children’s problems.

 

Anyone who counts on luck to succeed usually ends up unsuccessful.  This applies to parenting success as well to every other area of life.

 

Better Parenting For Healthy Child Behavior

Be the ray of light as parents to help your kids sparkle and shine

To be among the “lucky parents” you might begin by paying closer attention to your child’s feelings during your parent-child interactions.

 

Keep your heart open and sensitive to your child’s deepest feelings, instead of reacting to child discipline problems with anger and stress.

 

As you begin nurturing your child’s tender heart through more conscious, compassionate parenting you will raise a happier child who displays more beautiful behavior.

 

Do YOU believe that parenting success is really just a matter of luck?

Help struggling parents, and those who believe that better parenting skills produce better-behaved children, by sharing in this blog some of the parenting mistakes you feel that you have made, and what you wish you had done instead.


Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

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Create Life-Balance To Raise Happy Children

By Bob Lancer   |  Thursday, March 1st, 2012

Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

Parenting Classes For Raising Happy Children

Create happier times with your kids to deepen and strengthen family bonding.

 

At one of my recent parenting classes, I discussed the need for a deep heart-connection in the parent-child relationship.

 

“As we nurture children emotionally,” I explained,“their behavior expresses more loving kindness and healthy self-esteem than when kids feel emotionally deprived.”

 

A parent in the class raised her hand and posed this common parenting problem:  “In today’s world, when both parents need to work full time, and jobs often demand more than the old, standard 40 hours a week, we’re not able to give our kids the quality time they need.”

 

My response to that addressed the creative power and responsibility of every one of us:

 

“Your circumstances are a product of your own creation.  You have the power to create the life-balance to support the emotional development of your child.

 

“I know parents who have made huge financial sacrifices to be able to provide their children with all the quality time their kids need.

 

Raising Happy Children

“You empower yourself to succeed relative any goal by seeing yourself as the creator of your circumstances, not as a victim of your circumstances.

“Others found creative ways to maintain a high income while meeting the emotional needs of their children.

 

“You empower yourself to succeed relative any goal by seeing yourself as the creator of your circumstances, not as a victim of your circumstances.

 

“Though you may not know what you can do right now to improve the balance of your life, begin by clearly defining life-balance as your goal and commit to making it happen.

 

“In the meantime, if you cannot increase the quantity of time you spend with your kids, improve the quality of the precious time that you do have with them.

 

“Practice connecting with your children in a more conscious and loving way when you are together. Create happier times with your kids to deepen and strengthen family bonding.”

 

“Turn every moment you spend with your daughter into a kind of parenting class by closely observing her, in order to improve your understanding of your child. This is how to better meet your child’s need for a deep heart-connection in the parent-child relationship

 

Please feel welcome to share your comments in this blog about this parenting advice, and any questions you have about overcoming the challenge to providing children with all the quality time they need from us to feel great and to display beautiful behavior.


Receive your FREE Parenting Advice through this blog. Simply ask Bob Lancer your question and receive his Lancer’s Answer in this blog.

 

Wisie Members: Please feel welcome to share your views in this blog regarding any of the Wisie videos, and to ask questions about how to make the most of them.

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